An old guy walks into a bar on night. and was telling about all of his hunting experiences and one guy asked him what is the most painful momet you have had hunting. and he said he was hunting deer in canada and had to take a shit. So he found a tree and leaned against it and when his balls saged down a bear trap jumped up and grabed his balls.and he jumed into the air.And the guy said wow I can see why that is the most painful moment ever and he said no that is only the second most painful moment. The most painful was when I ran out of chain.

A fellow was telling a couple his friends about the tragedy that befell him while scouting the woods that weekend prior to opening of deer season. "I was goin' through the woods", he said, "when, turning behind a big tree, I came face to face with a huge grizzly."....."Wow!", said one of the friends, "that must've been really scarey". ..."Yeah", said the man telling the story, "The grizzly reared up like this" (man stands up, raises both hands in front...with hands clawed), "and goes GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!! Man, I just shit all over myself"\!!"...."Well, hell", says one of the buddies, "I'd shit all over myself, too, if a bear did that to me."......"No, no," said the teller, I didn't mean, then.....I meant, just now...when I reared up and screamed GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR"!

Two guys out hunting and they just shot a deer. As they're walking up to it, the one hunter says, "Man. Do I have to take a dump." So, the other hunter says, "While I start gutting the deer, why don't you take a dump next to them bushes." "Good idea, be right back." So the guy walks over next to some bushes and squats down. Meanwhile his buddy slices open the deer and throws the guts over his shoulder, landing them next to his buddy, unbeknownst to him. About an hour later, the guy gutting the deer says to his friend, "Hey, you okay? " The guy taking a dump says, "Well, I took a shit over in the bushes like you told me, and I shit my guts out. BUT, with a sharp stick and a little of god's luck, I got them all back in!"